Nationalism does nothing but teach you how to hate people that you never met. And all of a sudden you take pride in accomplishments you had no part in whatsoever, and you brag about — and the Americans'll go "Fuck the French! Fuck the French, if we hadn't had saved their ass in two World Wars, they'd be speakin' German right now!" And you go, "Oh, was that us?" That was us? Was that me and you, Tommy, we saved the French? Jesus! I know I blacked out a little bit after that fourth shot of Jägermeister last night, but I don't remember... I know we went through the Wendy's drive-thru to get one of them "Freschetta" sandwiches that looked so alluring on the commercial, but then we ordered it and realized we had no money, and we had to ditch out before the second window, and those douchebags in line behind us with the bass music probably got our order and we laughed about that. But I don't remember savin' the French. At all! I went through the last ten calls on my cell phone and there's nothin' incoming or outgoing to the French, lookin' for muscle on a project! I checked my pants, there's no mud stains on the knees from where we were garroting Krauts in the trenches at Verdun. I think we didn't do anything but watch sports bloopers while we got hammered. I think we should shut the fuck up!
民族主義教會你的唯一一件事，就是去憎恨那些你從沒見過的人。突然間，你就為那些從來沒有參與過的成就感到驕傲，還為此大吹特吹——（法國反對美國伊拉克戰爭後）美國人總是說「艹他媽的法國人！艹他媽的法國人，要不是當初我們在兩次世界大戰中救了他們，現在他們就得說德語了！」你這麼說：「哦？是我們麼？」是我們麼？Tommy，是你和我，咱們兩個去救的法國人麼？天吶！我知道昨晚我喝了四杯野格酒就斷片了一會兒，但是我不記得……我知道我們開到溫蒂漢堡的汽車點餐，買了廣告上特好看的那個三明治，但是點完之後發現兩人都沒帶錢，然後沒取餐沒付錢就直接跑了，估計店員把我們點的東西給了後邊那群開着重低音的傻逼，然後咱倆還嘲笑他們來着。但是我不記得救了法國人啊。屁都不記得啊！我看手機上最後十個電話，根本沒有和法國打過，沒有電話說要來招募我！我看我褲子上面連個泥點都沒有，更別說在凡爾登的戰壕里殺過德國鬼子了。我認為「我們」啥都沒幹過，就只是喝高了看比賽花絮。我認為「我們」應該閉上他媽的臭嘴。
